Friday, December 19, 2008

The Twists and Turns of Presidential Saga

For the history books: In the year of our Lord 2008, grown men in Ghana danced the ugliest inelegant dance moves ever, without feeling shy. Who would have thought that decent men, desperate for high public office, would imitate kangaroos in motion! We don’t even have kangaroos in this part of the world! Why Samuel Essiene has not claimed exclusive rights to the kangaroo dance moves and loads of money from the NPP is beyond me.

And then there is the awkward rotational hand movements, quite meaningless but for the sake of symbolism to get the message out, respectable men with their eyes firmly focused on the ultimate political price, pretend to love such awkward tongue-biting dance moves. The things people will do for gains! And for love too!

D.H. Lawrence’s poem, entitled “GOD” sums up this phenomenon best: “Only man can fall from God. Only man! That awful and sickening endless, sinking sinking through the slow corruptive levels of disintegrative knowledge…..the awful katabolism into the abyss!”

So it appears that we have arrived at the crossroads of rotational politics in which we give one party the chance to rule for the limited duration as enjoined by the 1992 Constitution. Then, when their time expires, the very next time around, we automatically reverse to the other party so we can try them too, applying the rule of “Moko aya ni moko aba” – a Ga expression for taking turns. Attah Mills and Akufo Addo are contemporaries who in their days, danced twist; so they have set up a nation to dance twist with them – a game of musical chairs just so one of them would become president.

In a bizarre way, this appears to be the best way for the political elite to share the national cake, a ‘You chop small, I chop small’ arrangement. Meanwhile, the situation of the ordinary person does not change in any significant manner under either of the two parties; and we know it.

What we are yet to figure out is how to get the best out of our leaders. We vote for them, place them on pedestals as lords so we can’t touch them or hold them accountable. Even when we witness or suspect that they are taking us for granted, that they are amassing wealth at our expense, we don’t seem capable of doing much to stop them.

For instance, since we know the temptation of leadership and their cronies to become corrupt, why is it that the assets they declare do not become public knowledge so at the time of exit from office, we can openly compare their before and after wealth status? Why is it that we just complain but are helpless in stopping corruption, and the annoying display of pride and hooliganism?

So three days after Christmas, we will return to the ballot box to cast votes in our characteristic bi-polar fashion, for either Akufo Addo or Attah Mills with petty reasons informing our choices. The winner may win the vote not for reasons of superior ideas. Sadly, the win may be due to good campaign songs, awkward and ugly dance moves, and uninspiring and meaningless candidate-centred slogans. The good songs and exotic dance moves only act as balm to soothe our deep-seated wounds, albeit temporal.

There is the pretence of using words and slogans which are not clearly defined but used as anchors for deceit. Take for examples the campaign slogans of moving forward and change. Why is it that many people are still stuck in poverty without any significant success chalked in the poverty alleviation realm? What categories of our people have so far moved forward? Is it that the privileged are moving forward while the poor majority cheer them on? As they cheer, what are the definite plans to push them forward so they don’t stand still in stinky poverty? The NPP campaign theme does not answer my deep-seated questions.

But the NDC change rhetoric makes me nervous. Change! What change? The funny thing is that the change rhetoric was borrowed from Obama. It migrated to Ghana when it caught on so well in the USA. Clearly, it was taken out of context without any relevant retrofitting.

One of the frightening things about change is that it can be mismanaged, a lot. When mismanagement occurs, the system is left worse off than it was before the implementation of change initiatives. Also, beware of change that is implemented just for the sake of change. It is said that ‘if it ain’t broke, don’t fix it’. Just crying wolf about change can end up running a system aground. As a country, we are at a point where the least we need is for our progress to be run aground.

Professor Mills, why have you not dropped Koku Anyidoho, the head of your Communications team, like a load of garbage? He and his likes, through their reckless pronouncements, are the type of characters who can run our beautiful country aground.

We’ve been bombarded with other weak slogans during this lengthy campaign season. When one of the presidential candidates claimed that he is the “Best man for Ghana”, the other quickly hit back with claims that he is “A better man for a better Ghana.” These claims have left me wondering if the presidential bid between Akuffo Addo and Attah Mills is a mere context in erectile functioning and/or mal-functioning. It is as if they are rubbing it in for us women that it takes a man to rule Ghana and that the presidential election is nothing but a show and test of manhood. Damn!

A demand on manliness clearly eliminates lip-stick-wearing, high-heeled shoes stomping and kaba-slit head-gear spotting females. Meanwhile, women have become endangered species in political leadership. From 25 parliamentarians in the out-going parliament, women’s representation has dropped to 15, a mere 6.5% of the 230 membership of the law-making fraternity. Ouch!

So this Christmas, as we celebrate the birth of Jesus the Christ, whom Christians and Muslims revere and call Lord, we dare not break into singing certain religious songs or dance carelessly, lest we betray our political leanings and be charged in God’s house as NDC or NPP supporters. Woe unto you if you insult the sense and sensibilities of your pew neighbours! Christmas is a season to be Christ-like but we quickly turn around to crucify the Christ without blinking an eye lid or feel any sense of guilt and shame.

While waiting for the presidential run-off elections next week, the naughty part of me is tempted to suggest that we should place the two men in a boxing ring and let them slush it out. After all, once upon a time, Nelson Mandela was a boxer! Or, we should put each person at the end of a tight rope and leave them to pull until one of them pushes the other to the ground or the rope breaks. Whoever falls first, or whoever the rope breaks closest to, should be declared the loser. Preferably, the iconic Mohammed Ali or flamboyant boxing promoter Don King should referee. And, the context should be broadcasted live on large screen TVs throughout the country. It will be so much fun.

dorisdartey@yahoo.com

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